Ghostbusters Frozen Empire: Bustin’ for a new generation?

There’s no getting around the fact that the original, beloved Ghostbusters are too old to carry the franchise anymore. So, if Hollywood wants to keep milking this intellectual property, they only have two choices. They either have to do a full reboot and recast all the characters. Which they tried. And failed. Spectacularly. Possibly even historically. I don’t need to rehash that.

The second choice is to ‘pass the torch’, which is what Ghostbusters Frozen Empire and Afterlife are attempting to do. And, in the Average Dude’s opinion, not very well. I’m not proud of saying that because who didn’t love the Ivan Reitman/Harold Ramis/Dan Ackroyd story?

Ghosted by the ghosts

Here’s something that needs to be said about Ghostbusters Frozen Empire…you kinda want to see some ghosts, right? They don’t even have to be scary ones like Viggo (well….).

There were a couple of low-level spooks early on, including a nice throwback to Slimer. But there just wasn’t that much ghost busting going on. And the big bad frozen ghostie? He was almost an afterthought. We barely saw him at all. Yeah, I didn’t feel any real threat from that guy. And that’s kind of a good thing, because this group of Ghostbusters doesn’t seem all that capable. Or smart. Other than Phoebe, the offspring of Egon Spangler. And speaking of our favorite 15 year old proton particle accelerator super-genius…

for the first time…trans-dimensional same sex hookups!

Of all the ghosts that appeared in Ghostbusters Frozen Empire, the one that garnered the most screen time was Melody, a young lady who died in a fire. Recently, judging by her spectral attire. Why did she still look young and pretty while every other ghost looks like sun-baked @$$…no clue. I guess because a trist between a 15 year old and a ghost sewer gator doesn’t have the same appeal.

The character development and screentime disparity between villain and ghost hookup wasn’t even close. Without dropping any spoilers I can say that the writers, quite by accident, showed how an adult can manipulate an angry, lonely and depressed teenager to their own ends. I wonder how many people actually caught that. I did.

So, to ask the obvious question…

No, it’s not who you gonna call? The answer to that is the OG Ghostbusters, clearly. The obvious question: Is Ghostbusters Frozen Empire worth the watch? Answer: Yes, but barely, and with reservations.

The new crew is not capable of carrying the franchise on their own. Not yet. They have the resident super-genius but she’s still a kid, which makes it hard to buy into her character. Paul Rudd, consumate scene-stealer, creates the right balance to ghost-science boss Phoebe as did Bill Murray in the original. Every other character was a throw-away. Except maybe the ‘Firemaster’. Similar to the ‘Keymaster’ or the ‘Gatekeeper’, but okay. And I may be in the minority, but I still find Kumail Nanjiani’s deadpan schtick funny.

There were plenty of remember-berries (as there were in Afterlife) to tweak our nostalgia. I loved them even though they were obviously forced. But the whole barely adolescent same-sex ‘romance’ was creepy AF, and not in the good way that Ghostbusters is known for. Nope.

That’s what I said…booty trap

And I’m not going to harp on the fact that the kids in Ghosebusters Frozen Empire were basically unparented and at hazard constantly. C’mon. It’s a movie, not a PTA family. Nobody boo-hoo’d about the Goonies. It’s fine, karen. However, if that, then this: the only adult that actually tried to parent was Rudd’s character. I’m not sure if he was actually a step-dad or just a ghostbusting booty call. But the actual mother couch-tatering and phone surfing between spooks was a disturbing writer’s choice. That’s all I’ll say.

With all that in mind, I’m not afraid to give Ghostbusters Frozen Empire the marginal approval of 2.75/5. If you go in knowing that, you should be okay. Sure, there were plot holes big enough to drive a proton powered hearse through. But you still get OG Ghostbusters like mamma used to make. More than in Afterlife, as a matter of fact. And that’s enough for the Average Dude.

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